Yeah, everyone is spot on, but it feels like I have rose tinted glasses permanently attached to my face. Psychology is a real bitch. I miss her, a lot. I daydream about cheesy romantic comedy-esque reunions when my mind isn't preoccupied. I know there's always someone who will be statistically better for me, that's just how statistics work with 8 billion different people, but I feel there is beauty in choice. A beauty in the choice to love the other person regardless of finding someone potentially more like yourself. You make a choice to show them they matter by forsaking any other possibilities, and allowing yourself to be blinded, and not letting in those creeping doubts.
I haven't talked to her since I've made this post, and I don't plan to. I know she loves me, I know she misses me, the love never left at any point in time. But I also know she's young, just 21, and she wants to experience what the world has to offer without regret. It's not as big of a cop out as one would think. I'm only 23, and do not share that innate desire to sow my oats, but she was always incredibly sexual and I knew she was really hormonal, she wants to have her experiences, and I understand that in a logical biological sense, but I don't have the capacity to emotionally accept it
Again though, i'm being a depressing bitch right now. That being said...
She had kind of a weird square butt....
and that is sacred topic. No sharing.