"The Median Patch Notes" Game

[billy500]

+All median patch notes are now redundant and instead are filled with joyous puns about the left nut who could.
-All players get herpes.

[GregMXL]

+Can now achieve a longer lasting erection.
-Anyone who has, does and will play this mod gets full blown AIDS.

[billy500]

+Stigma can now be implemented into the third legged race.
-Gets a negative cookie.

[GregMXL]

+Anyone who has AIDS and plays this game get a free item and some tg.
-Sigma is not compatible with AIDS.

[ekkudapoxui]

+AIDS is now curable by defeating Brother Laz
-Brother Laz is replaced with Archibishop Lazarus

[GregMXL]

+You can summon Brother Laz after you defeat Archbishop Lazarus.
-The real life Brother Laz sues Marco. Median is no more.

[ekkudapoxui]

+Marco makes Median XD
- it has the worst memes in history

[GregMXL]

+Median Memes are the hottest thing.
-But they're all true.

[billy500]

+SIGMA is released.
-It's turned into an 80's sitcom starring David Spade.

[GregMXL]

+Kevin Spacey is released.
-Hide your male children.